The Kids
[Intro: Teacher]
And everyone should get along
Okay children quiet down, quiet down
Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day
His name is Mr. Shady
Children quiet down please
Brian don't throw that (SHUT UP!)
Mr. Shady will be your new substitute
While Mr. Kaniff is out with pneumonia (HE'S GOT AIDS!)
Good luck Mr. Shady
[Verse 1: Eminem] Hi there little boys and girls (FUCK YOU!) Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob (Huh?) Say hi Bob! ("Hi Bob") Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom And he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot But his twelve-year-old brother looks up to him an awful lot And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spot And wait in the parking lot for waitresses off the clock When it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!) And even if they escaped and they got the cops The ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge 'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job When she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr." He grabbed Stace' by the legs as chopped it off her And dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander They never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner And that's the story of Bob and his marijuana And what it might do to you So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you
[Hook: Teacher] See children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon) And if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man) And if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right) She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will) So kids say no to drugs (that's right) So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh) Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along) Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Verse 2: Eminem] My penis is the size of a peanut, have you seen it? FUCK NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?) Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels? Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid And spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back Meet Zach, twenty-one years old After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold And decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys And peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive And his eyes roll back in his skull {â
[Verse 1: Eminem] Hi there little boys and girls (FUCK YOU!) Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob (Huh?) Say hi Bob! ("Hi Bob") Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom And he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot But his twelve-year-old brother looks up to him an awful lot And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spot And wait in the parking lot for waitresses off the clock When it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!) And even if they escaped and they got the cops The ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge 'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job When she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr." He grabbed Stace' by the legs as chopped it off her And dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander They never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner And that's the story of Bob and his marijuana And what it might do to you So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you
[Hook: Teacher] See children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon) And if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man) And if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right) She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will) So kids say no to drugs (that's right) So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh) Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along) Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Verse 2: Eminem] My penis is the size of a peanut, have you seen it? FUCK NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?) Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels? Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid And spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back Meet Zach, twenty-one years old After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold And decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys And peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive And his eyes roll back in his skull {â